The words you use have no meaning in themselves. You attribute meanings to your words as you use them. Even your own meanings have this significance within their original context when they were spoken or written. An hour or a year later the same words may mean different things to you, with different emotional overtones.
Similarly, the person or people to whom you are speaking attributes their own meanings to your words as they hear them at that moment.
Therefore, do not choose your words by their meanings, since these meanings are only yours and only at this moment. Rather, choose your words according to their effect on the other person. To do this you need to listen to him/her very carefully and without prejudice, in order to discover their language at this moment.